I think one of the worst things social media has done to indie authors is make us believe we should constantly be measuring ourselves against everybody else.

You log on for a few minutes and suddenly somebody is celebrating a bestseller badge, somebody landed a big interview, somebody sold out an event, and somebody else is talking about how they made five figures from their latest launch. If you’re not careful, you can go from feeling perfectly okay about your own journey to questioning everything you’re doing.

And I don’t even think most of us are jealous.

I think comparison does something more subtle than that. It plants doubt.

Now you’re wondering if you should be selling more books by now. You’re wondering if you should be posting more, doing more, launching more, growing faster. You start questioning your timeline, your strategy, and sometimes even your talent.

That’s where comparison becomes dangerous, because it pulls your focus away from your own work and puts it squarely on somebody else’s.

Instead of writing the book you want to write, you start chasing what seems to be working for other people. Instead of building the business you actually want, you start copying someone else’s model.

And here’s the problem with that.

Not every author wants the same thing.

I feel like this is something we do not say enough in the indie author space. Not every author wants to be famous. Not every author wants to go viral. Not every author wants to become a full-time content creator who spends half the day filming reels and chasing algorithms.

Some authors want to write meaningful books and build slowly. Some want to use their books to get speaking engagements. Some want to coach. Some want to consult. Some want to build community. Some want credibility. Some want impact.

Those are all valid.

But if you do not define success for yourself, social media will happily define it for you.

And usually social media defines success with very loud, very visible metrics. Followers. Likes. Comments. Rankings. Sales screenshots.

The problem is those numbers do not tell the whole story.

You have no idea what is happening behind someone else’s post. You do not know how much they spent on ads. You do not know if they are burned out. You do not know if they are drowning trying to keep up appearances. You do not know if their business model would even make sense for you.

So let’s talk about what you can actually do when comparison starts creeping in, because just saying “stop comparing yourself” is not helpful.

First, pay attention to when comparison shows up.

Be honest. Is there a certain platform that triggers you? Is it Instagram? Threads? Facebook groups? Is it a certain type of post? Sales posts? Launch posts? Followers? Start noticing the pattern. You cannot fix what you are not aware of.

Second, get clear on what success actually looks like for you.

And I mean really clear.

Why did you write your book?

Was the goal to become a bestselling author? Maybe. But maybe not. Maybe your book is there to establish credibility. Maybe it is opening doors for speaking, consulting, or partnerships. Maybe the book is not even the business. Maybe the book is the bridge to the business.

That distinction matters.

Because once you know what you are actually building, it becomes much easier to stop obsessing over metrics that were never tied to your real goal anyway.

Third, and this is a big one, stop consuming so much and start creating more.

I’m serious.

If you spend three hours watching everybody else build and thirty minutes working on your own business, comparison is going to win every time.

Sometimes the best thing you can do is log off.

Go write.
Go outline.
Go build.
Go work on your website.
Go pitch yourself to a podcast.
Go contact a bookstore.
Go do something that moves your own work forward.

Action kills a lot of insecurity.

And finally, remember that somebody else’s success is not proof of your failure.

I really need authors to understand that.

Just because another author is winning right now does not mean there is less room for you. Publishing is not pie. Somebody else getting a bigger slice does not automatically shrink yours.

There is room.

But you have to stay focused long enough to build something that actually fits you instead of constantly trying to become somebody else.

That, to me, is how you beat comparison.

You stop using other people’s journeys as a measuring stick for your own life. You define success for yourself, you get clear on what you’re building, and you put more energy into creating than consuming.

Because comparison will absolutely kill creativity if you let it.

And as an indie author, creativity is one of your greatest assets.

Protect it.

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